Angela Krebs - Intro

My name is Angela Krebs and I have been HIV+ for almost 21 years. I am 37, married and have 2 children that were planned and are negative. I am from Indianapolis, Indiana.

I was searching for information on muscle pain and HIV, as I have HIV arthritis and constant body pain, and for some reason God took me to “A Girl Like Me”.  I have no friends that are HIV+ and as my struggle with my health begins to effect my everyday functioning, I feel alone.  I watched Maria Mejia’s video blog and began to cry as I too was just a teenager when I was infected.  I was 16 and the guy I was involved with was 24 and lied to me and said he had cancer.  I later found out he had been diagnosed with AIDS 2 years prior to meeting me.  I stayed and watched him take his last breath at the age of 17.  I would never wish my experience on anyone.

Why Angela want to be a part of A Girl Like Me: I hope I can be an encouragement to my fellow positive girls and I too be uplifted and not feel alone in my struggle through my “Life Sentence”.

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Comments

david lulasa's picture

GOD will still love the unplanned children,AIDS victims will continue being loved by GOD too..GOD would like us to be more of wisdom whilst still on earth..

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Khadijat's picture

Angela you are welcome to A Girl Like Me you are at the right place.

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Angela Krebs's picture

Thanks so much Khadijat.

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Sebes's picture

Angela and Eva if you dont mind may i please have your personal email addresses like you to share something with me.

Kind Regards

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Eva Rapoo's picture

I have just recently found that I'm positive I have no idea how to tackle this. But I know through ur guys encouragement I will pull through this. If my guessing correctly I have been infected for atleast six months I found out when o wantes to take life insurance. But I was strong enough to accept my results and walk out of those offices smiling. I hv a boyfriend his negative he loves me but is so scared of me he thinks that having intercourse with me he will get infected. I need a strategy on how we break the ice. I disclosed to him and he told me how much he loved but the problem is he wants a family a normal life if I may put it. How do I give him that how do we take the first step to this journey. In South Africa HIV is an issue that people don't open up too. Which makes it very difficult for people like us to cope.

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Angela Krebs's picture

Eva,
You are precious for sharing with me and encouraging me. Thank you so much. HIV is scarey but it no longer is a death sentence. I do get down and bummed about it about 1-2 a year where I really break down but then through my tears I see my children and remember that the guy that infected me didn't steal my dreams of babies, he only made the road a little bumpy. I am not sure how things are over in Africa but the medicine now days is WONDERFUL and can keep that transmission rate from mother to child waaaayyyyy down. There are ways to be safe and not risk your boyfriend's life and still get pregnant.
When we tried to get pregnant with both of my children, I helped him do "his business" in a bowl, I know it's tooo funny as I type this out, and then he literally poured it in me while I stood on my head!!!!! Sounds really funny but it worked, not once but twice!!!!!
Just because we are HIV+ doesn't mean we can't live a "normal" life.
You are a wonderful woman and it will all be ok. Update me and let me know how you are doing. I am thrilled to hear from you.

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Eva Rapoo's picture

I love ur blog

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Angela Krebs's picture

Thanks Eva

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Lynn2011's picture

Welcome Angela. SO glad you are here.

Lynn

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Angela Krebs's picture

Thanks so much Lynn

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dasassidiva's picture

I'm also in SA if u need a shoulder to cry feel free....rememba ur diagnosis you were sumbody nd you still that person so it does not define you

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Angela Krebs's picture

Thank you so much Sassy. You have helped to brighten my day.

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mirriam's picture

Hello Angela, how are u hope u are fine today and am glad u r here love from us all
Mirriam - Uganda

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sketty's picture

am encouraged by ya story Angela. i was diagnized positive in 2008 but i refused to take septrins for fear of messing up with my organs too early in time. my cd4 count is 900 and all i do is take care of myself by just a good diet. what do you think about septrins with such a high cd4?
sketty. Kenya

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Angela Krebs's picture

Sketty,
I have not heard of Septrins so I will have to look that one up on the internet and educate myself on them. My cd4 cout was 380 at last check. I feel that is actually pretty good considering the length of time I have been HIV and with the problems I have had getting over the bulging disc in my neck and now the arthritis in my body.
I currently take the following HIV meds: Kaletra-2 times a day, Epivir-2 times a day, and Viread-1 time a day. I am not the best at being 100% on taking them but I try. The side effects are virtually none!! Then of course you throw in the pain medicine for my body pain an medicine for depression.
I too try to eat healthy and maintain my weight. Everyone in my family is small, skinny. so I try to keep that in mind when it comes to my weight.
I am thrilled for you that your cd4 count is so high!!!!!!!!!! you go Honey!!!!!! not sure if you will understand that--it means--wonderful--great for you. Thank you so much for your support. I will research the Septrin and let you know my thoughts.

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Angela Krebs's picture

Mumbaiyyagal,
I am very proud of you for coming clean about your status and not lieing any longer. That was very brave of you. I think sometimes we do things not to be mean but because we are so afraid of the rejection or the pain of being alone. I am very thankful your boyfriend/ ex-boyfriend turned out to be negative.
It must be hard having all of those horrible feelings of guilt, pain and suffering as you talked about but it will be ok. You have to forgive yourself. It will eat you up inside if you don't let them go. Look to the future and continue to count all of those blessings you have. You ARE good and caring or you wouldn't have came out with the truth. We all make mistakes in life. None of us are perfect.
I have forgiven the guy that lied and infected me. In fact, I'm not sure I ever truely got really really mad as people think I should. Yes it does upset me that he did that to me but I do hope and pray that he made peace with God and is in heaven and not suffering. I cannot imagine what my life would be like if I carried around hate for him.
You are doing such a good thing by telling your story and letting people know that it is ok to be honest and reveal your status. I am thankful for your story.

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mumbaiyyagal's picture

Hi Angela,
Nice that you came out in the open and told us the story. And by the responses you are getting, you know that you are never alone. Internet has made world a small place to live in and thru this medium ur cry for help/support/love can be reached to millions in few minutes of time.
Even I had lied to my boyfriend that I had cancer. And that lie was pulling me down. I dont know how to tell him as I was not strong enough to tell anyone regarding my status that time. The ignorance of this INDIA is such that one is treated as "untouchable" there and thus so as not to lose him (as I loved him too much), I had used this lie to keep him, without realising that I was playing with his life, his future, his family. Thankfully, he is tested negative but I am still living with this guilt. He has now become my strong support system and I was so ashamed of my lie that I decided that I will go public and tell people my story, educate them, help them in opening out their status to those who mattered and more importantly, LIVE WITH REJECTION without having to lose your pride. I am living with the rejection of not having my boyfriend marrying me and calling the relationship off, but am happy that he didnt cut off all ties with me and we have become close friend and he is my best support system. Overall, am living with guilt, pains, sufferings but am thankful for small things. So count your blessings one by one......

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loved's picture

dear friends,i have dicovered that im HIV +a year ago,since it was difficult my CD4 cound went from 271 to 248 and i started taking some medications but they did work coz i first have to accept myself first,im in SA but everything is fine coz im doing a lot better and i hope you could all pray for me as im going for my first cd4 cound check after i have started with the medication.

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Angela Krebs's picture

Loved,
I am praying for you!!! I have been HIV+ for 21 years and my CD4 count is 380 and I have a Viral Load of 36,000 and that is with me not being perfect on taking my medicine!!! There is always hope. Be strong and know it's ok. Please keep me updated on your counts. I am here for you along with a lot of others. You are precious and I pray nothing but good for you.

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