When did you tell your child?

Submitted by posgirl77

Hi Katie this is Darla I met you at PWN  USA. Disclosing to my 13 yr old son has been on my mind recently. He knows I take medicine but he doesn't really question it. I just disclosed my status openly to adults I know after 18 years of silence. I am aftraid to tell him because I don't think he will understand that it is probably not somthng he should tell his friends. I am afraid his friends or their parents out of ignorance will not want their child to hang out with mine. Then he is going to be mad at me because I am the one with HIV. I know I have to get past this. I must tell him before he is sexually active so he knows the threat is real and how to protect himself.. Unfortunately we do not have a very good relationship. He is angry at his birth mother (I adopted him when he was 5) and also with me because of the drug problem I had. I am now 16mo clean. If we had a better relationship I would tell him. But you probably have a better relationship with your son., I don't think I would tell him at age 7.. I have to ask myself what purpose does it serve. Yes we are trying to reduce stigma but can children really be expected to understand that?  I wish it were as simple as telling him I have like diabetes but the real world isn't like that right now. You know your child and you will know when the time is riight.. You are much more open about your status I think so maybe it will be easier for you. It is a question that I struggle with.. It was nice meeting you at  PWN and hope all is well with you.