Craving Not to Judge

Submitted on Oct 7, 2019 by  Destiny Smith

Since I've announced my status to the world my life has literally been an open book. From strangers to associates I haven’t seen or spoken to in years, people asking me questions, personal or just educational, people asking for advice… It was like I was actually somebody, I was actually helping people learn about something that 7 months ago I knew nothing about. But this was my life and that was okay with me. Though I’m not going to lie, sometimes I didn’t feel like I could talk to anyone or express myself cause really no one was actually going through what I was going through. They just knew and understood I was going through this, you know?

The thing is I'm up all hours of the night just thinking and reminiscing about this virus sitting inside of me. Because it’s like a craving that I just need to know exactly what day, what time did I get it; why didn’t I know I was being passed something that I was going to have to deal with for the rest of my life? I’m not going to lie, I’m still scared sometimes because I don’t understand it 100%, but every day I’m learning. I’m learning about HIV and the difference between it and AIDS. I’m learning about the symptoms and different sayings and words.

I've met people who also have this virus and just like me they are normal people, happy people, just trying to live their best lives without being judged. Because in all reality, who is anybody to judge anybody?

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