The Press, supress, our stories of happiness. They try to define us, as "Suffering Headliners". No one writes when the virus has refined us, Given us gratitude, a loving attitude. The media just want to, undermine us. They concentrate on the criminality, The shock and shame of our sexuality. We want to be valued for our femininity, To find a true voice for our creativity. To show we are all wonderful women, Much more than our status. Living our lives, strong and gracious. We deserve to be reported with dignity, Accepted as part of humanity. Let us be respected, celebrated, honoured and...
MelPainter2014's blog
Results: HIV 0 Me 1 As I type the score, I want to share it's not a competition, or a game, but definitely a victory!
I enter a grandiose world of security and red carpets, regency furniture and high ceilings. I am escorted, actually more like, guided with grace to the ballroom.
#Blacklivesmatter What does this mean to me? I am a white woman, I have privilege. I recognise that we don't have to have a hashtag for white lives.
So #Love Positive Women is over and I wanted to share the love and write here because my 'romance' with myself began not 'at home', but with The Well Project. I want to share how far I have come and express my gratitude.
It's been a year since I sang with Joyful Noise, not for want of trying to get to rehearsals or lack of commitment to the choir, just life getting in the way.
Waiting, waiting for the test results, what can I say? Will it be high, low? How low can I go? I went in so confidently, no fear, I actually look forward to it, the reaffirmation that I'm doing well. A chance to update my consultant, he is the most consistent man in my life! 10 years now I've seen him. He's listened to a lot, heard me, hugged me, held me, and always reassured me. But this time was different, the system has changed and now instead of tea and cake in the clinic, a nice chat then the tests results emailed a week later. There's a new protocol, bloods first then 2 weeks later a...
Got results today, not for bloods but from my annual cervical smear; all good, as usual. I dutifully go every year to follow recommended procedure because of my status. Staring at the familiar flowers on the ceiling at my local GUM clinic I have a kind of epiphany, "HIV is for life, not just for clinic visits".
School's in for the winter! So at last I have access to the computer and no pending jobs to prevent me writing. I've made the lunches, ironed the uniforms, checked books, bags, etc., and waved my daughters off to start their studious day. I am alone, processing the summer, and can't think where to begin. I look out to the garden and see trees that need cutting. So I distract myself and decide to garden, and then while I prune, I cry. My son and I planted these twigs years ago and now they are thick trunks. I mourn that he didn't have a chance to grow and I weep, weep by the weeping willow...
It's been a while. Lots has happened! And I'm just about to embark on a 3 week working holiday road trip and then a stay at KPS Trebullom so thought it's time to catch up and share. It's all good in the hood! In May I got great blood results - CD4 726 VL 457 - and completed another 21 day HIV meditation project with new friends made and great feedback received. I also started dating...yeah that's kinda why I haven't written for a while, that and my two daughters' exams, prom, performances, birthday and boyfriend/girlfriend celebrations and commiserations! So this is where the unique problems...