Hello, I am 30 years old...

Hello, I am 30 years old and have had a positive status for 5 years now. I have been undetectable for about that long. It has been a lonely journey. I’ve never sought out support regarding my status before, save one friend with mutual status. I’m reaching out now because I am pregnant with my first child. I’ve been undetectable for 4.5 years and healthy. I’ve been reassured by my specialist that I can have children without passing the virus. Now that I am pregnant, and being considered “high risk”, I’m experiencing sadness and fear. I got very upset at the prospect of not having the right to breastfeed. I feel lost about the whole process of care. I feel very alone not being able to talk to anyone about the reason of my high risk pregnancy, my partner is very kind and supportive but doesn’t understand. I’m hoping that there are mothers in this group that can share their experiences with me.

1
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Just needing a ear and a friend

Comments

9 comments

Submitted by Tilly
2

Hi rose I’m currently pregnant with my second little both conceived while I am undetectable, it passes so long as you keep taking your meds and remain undetectable you will be fine I’m not sure in your country but mines you can breastfeed but you can use any substitutes or mix and there’s a solution they take that protects the baby I did for about 3 months when I went back to work I stopped completely , it’s okay to feel fear , I still have anxiety even when my child has a cold I think maybe I might have done something wrong but rest assured it’s okay to feel I’m still dealing with my anxieties step by step even with the second on the way, you’ll be fine just enjoy your precious ❤️

Submitted by Red40something
2

Please remain encouraged! It sounds like you are well on the right path and doing the right things for both you and your baby since you are undetectable. Great job! I'm reaching out to see if we can get some practical advice you can use, along with some encouragement. Please know, you did nothing wrong. Every pregnant mother living with HIV is considered high risk, so you are not alone!
In the meantime--The well project has been doing amazing work around pregnancy and breastfeeding and you can see some of that here --

https://www.thewellproject.org/hiv-information/breastfeeding-chestfeedi…

There are fact sheets and info, and also a video of a conversation with a pediatric provider and an HIV positive mother about it. feel free to reach back out to me if you need. I have not had a child while positive, but I can help encourage you and support you to find the information you need!
Be well!

Submitted by The Well Project
1

Hello Ophelia.Rose. Tahnk you for reaching out. You will definitely find support here and I suggest joining this group as well if you'd like to reach even more community members.

I'm also going to share some of our fact sheets around Pregnancy and Breastfeeding (see below). We're so glad you found the site.

Submitted by Escalice
2

I had just confirmed my pregnancy when I found out I was positive. I began meditation shortly and I remained undectable for my entire pregnancy. My daughter is perfectly healthy. As long as you remain undectable your baby will be ok! I know how scary it is but you're already doing it and have been for some time now. You got this. As far as breastfeeding there is so much information here at the well project and some AMAZING women and moms who have breastfed with the support of their providers. 

Submitted by tharris
2

Stay encouraged sister, I'm just joining the group and it seems that there is support here and that's great. I will pray for you and your baby. 

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