Learning to Love Myself Again: A Black Trans Woman's Journey Through Betrayal, Survival, and Self-Rediscovery

I'm a 36-year-old Black Trans woman living with HIV. For years, I believed I loved myself. I've been in therapy, I've done the work—or so I thought. I love my passion, my drive, my determination. I love how deeply I care for others. But maybe that's where I've fallen short: I've poured so much love into others that I've neglected to truly love myself.

Recently, I endured one of the most traumatic experiences of my life. I'm still navigating the PTSD and anxiety it left behind. And in that process, I've realized that my framework for self-love needs rebuilding. Continue reading...

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Comments

4 comments

Submitted by Red40something
1

What happened to you should not ever have happened. I no it takes a lot to share trauma publicly and I hope that opening uo has been more healing than additionally traumatic, and that you feel poured into and loved by chosen community and family. Sending you all of the light! Take care of you. 

Submitted by Iam_Kimberlyjune
0

Thank you, my friend. Your unwavering love and support continue to fuel my spirit and give me the strength to keep moving forward in this beautiful, complicated journey called life.

Submitted by Angel S.
1

Hi Kimberly 

I'm sorry you had to go through that.  I am a cis woman , I can not talk on my case ( its similar and pending). I can tell you sexual, mental and physical abuse is part of my story. I was gaslighted so bad i lost myself in drugs and alcohol. I from my own experience know how it feels for me when you realize you are not taking care of you first. Be kind and continue to be brave! I see love and kindness in you. For me it took a lot I still have to remember i am listening to myself so I don't need to repeat what others think or say. I need to be kind give myself grace. And process yourself in your time. I hope this makes sense. I'm just a note away . I am praying for your healing. I'm living in sober living I gave up everything I thought I had only to find what I really needed was to find how to love Angel. Be brave,!  Stay beautiful and I love you !

Submitted by Iam_Kimberlyjune
0

Thank you for sharing a piece of your journey with me, Angel. I see you. I’m truly sorry for all that you’ve endured—no one deserves that kind of pain, especially from those meant to love and uplift us. They may have hurt us and tried to break us, but we did not stay broken. I honor your sobriety and healing, and I deeply admire the strength it took to rise above such trauma. I see you, Angel, and I’m here for you too, beautiful soul. Thank you for taking the time to read my story.

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