Long Distance Relationships Can They Really Work?

 Having an online or long distance relationship can be hard sometimes all you can do is accept that you can't do those things you want to do. As hard as that sounds, acceptance is empowering. All that moping will do is bring you down, after all, so accept those things you currently can not change and embrace instead those things you do have.
Part of me is still crushed, right now as I am writing this because the thing I wanted most has been snatched away again. The other part of me says, "Just forgive , and keep trying to win at love." Since I can't see myself giving up I'll probably keep trying. Am I being really stupid? My last relationship destroyed me and I don't get out much. Basically I go to work,church and out with my Children. I honestly I have never gave time for myself. I find myself always doing for others and always finding myself alone in the end. I am a strong woman,I'm always told this.I set my mind to something and go for it. My hard work has paid off and I have done well as a single mother. My life has always focused on my children. My therapist told me this and I now agree its time to focus on me a little more. My therapist told me to get more social find my special someone. Since I don't go out he suggested social media. I have chatted and met some really nice people online only so far. The problem is almost everyone that has been interested in me are only interested in just a friendly hookup with no strings attached. Seems like if they are looking for one thing they should be asking Do you have anything? I always post in my profile  about my profession and Working and Helping Persons living with HIV. So much Stigma just from those two things . If they can't handle that then they can't handle my status.Also i post that I am looking for friends first and only friends.You will get some asking for nude photos or just hookups no matter what you put in your profile.
Most of the good responses I have had are far away. Sure we all want LOVE. I do believe my day will come. But hey I am not getting any younger. I am ready to live a little bit. My children are almost grown and I have the fear of being and growing old alone.
I am writing this because so many people have met online and have made it work.  A lot don't  make it because of the distance or trust issues they may be having.
 Anyway if you are involved with someone you met online or involved in a long distance relationship here are a few things that will hopefully help you and your someone special.
You have been questioning yourself whether or not a long distance relationship will work and are looking for an answer, the answer is Yes: These type of relationships can and do work. People in long distance relationships can have a hard time staying connected, because couples are limited in what they can do together. Many are limited to phone calls, emails, instant messaging, and texting which can become a bit overwhelming  over time. It is important to keep things interesting. Always try to have a budget set and have extra money for monthly trips to actually be able to spend time and physical companionship together.This of course depends on the distance and if you have free time off from work of course. Maybe you can spend every other weekend together!
Watch movies or TV shows simultaneously together! There are various ways of doing this. Most couples like to have contact while watching a movie together and do so over the phone and/or instant messenger and/or on their webcams :) You can each go out and physically rent the same movie and watch it together or you can access a streaming movie online. There are lots of websites that will deliver flowers for you, but if you don't want to spend money sending a real bouquet, you can send a virtual bouquet .E- cards are always fun to receive. (I haveused Beat Greets.) Think that  you have run out of everything you could say to each other? Or you find yourself talking about the same old stuff Try this.... When it's one of those days where you  just can't think of anything to talk about, try asking questions as a game. Share a journal or Invest in a webcam! First of all, if you don't already have a webcam, get one! You'll be glad you did. You can use Skype and it is free for all over the world using Skype to Skype video chat. This comes in handy when you feel lonely and cant sleep. You can have date nights also. Also try Multiplayer Games online. You can use Pogo.com here you have lots of games to choose from.(Word Games: Scrabble,Card Games: Spades, Euchre, Cribbage, Hearts, Bridge, Golf Solitaire
Board Games: Monopoly, Yahtzee, Dominoes, Chess, Backgammon, Checkers
Freebie Casino: High Stakes Poker, No Limit Texas Hold 'em and 6th Street Omaha Poker..)   Second Life is a virtual world created by its members. It is one of the more realistic real life games. You can do pretty much anything, go on dates, go to concerts, make out, and  more. You can even get married on Second Life. It is free to play. Also another great thing is there are many communication tools available to those in Long Distance Relationships. Communication is really important in all relationships. Technology today makes it easier free video and voice chat service is also  available all over the world.  This is the most used online communication tool.  MSN Messenger, formally known as Windows Messenger are all the same program, allowing you to instantly connect to your significant other and talk via the computer. AIM, has been around since the dawn of instant messaging. AIM is the standard messaging client that allows normal text chat and video. Also for your Smartphone there is Whatsapp, IMO, and Viber. Always remember Love knows no distance. There are ways to spend time together online. Make time for one another. For some, the distance is a good way to slowly open up to the relationship without the incessant presence of the partner. The romance stays kindled because you aren’t around the person 24/7, having to see various habits and routines that can get repetitive But disadvantages exists, it can be very frustrating that there is no intimacy, no hugging, no kissing  at least between the meetings. You will also experience difficulties in connecting sometimes because you don’t have eye contact, and can’t take walks or enjoy dinners out together.Just remember about that budget I was talking about earlier,Plan weekend visits or monthly visits whenever possible.


Stigma, Positive Relationships, and Healthy Living




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