We had yet another birthday party in the office. Once again, I was assigned plates, napkins and forks. I really do believe that my coworkers are afraid of the fact that I have HIV and do not want to eat any food I bring in. In fact, I have tried to bring a couple of things in the past, like brownies and a pumpkin pie, neither of which were touched by anyone but me. It's shocking to think that these college educated people are so ignorant about HIV that they are scared to eat anything I make! One of the other girls in the office went through some serious health issues and I remember my boss approached me and advised me not to eat anything she brought in and to basically be careful around her. My boss had been advised of this by her mother, a hospital employee. At the time, I thought she was looking out for me as an HIV patient with a compromised immune system. I now look back and realize that I was wrong. I am assuming she advised the other girls to also avoid any food that I bring in as well. I am just so shocked that people are scared to eat food I make! I just don't understand this. I'm very shocked, I'm very hurt and I feel like an outsider.
It amazes me how ignorant these people are. Maybe you should print out some information and pass it out before the next office party.
Wow we all have stories so powerful. A girl like me was a great one, and here I go...
In 1997 I was walking down the street in my first 8 months of clean and sober living. I was suddenly hit with a 2 X 4 and 5 other guys beating the pulp out of me. They dragged me behind a set of down town Charleston, SC building in the rich, historic battery district and predeeded to rape, beat and scream at me" ("B__ I am going to KILL you because some white B___ gave us AIDS!!!!!!!!). Well I was left for dead, in the middle of the dark by the time I awoke and taken to the ER. The police would not believe me because 8 months befor I had been their favorite crack, junkie, whore to pick on and bust. 4 months I stayed in a full body cast and begged my family to help me understand. They would not come near me. Well years passed by and still at the crack and booze because I just did not think I could live anyother way and live. Finally I got busted and sent to prison for a year where I was told I had HIV. I knew for a few years I had it, I just thought it would go away.
While I was hunting for my inner soul I met some girls who had been sent to prison via Charleston County Drug Court and the main counselor Ricky Dennis. I knew right then that that would be the man that God would work through to get to the heart of the matter. What was wrong with me? After I got out I went and found him, and was immediatly placed into Drug Court. It was on now! This man was a christian pitt bull and cut me not one bit of slack. All in all over a year time period I was introduced to mental health, to my family and to my daughter who I thought I would never see again. Now I am graduating from college at East Carolina University at the top 7% of my class, I have a wonderful relationship with my daughter who now is 13 and I have become a real live Softball Mom!!. 9 years clean and sober and I am so greatful to all the women in the USA I have been inspired by and whonm I get to inspire. I work as a counselor and a health education specialist in a community health clinic in rural NC and I am married to a professional HIV negative beautiful man. I hope someday I get to the white house through all the national affiliations I stive to bond with as a Positive Woman. Until then i am so greatful that HBO has taken my life story and is writing a book and a recovery movie to help others. We all have such remarkable stories.
Sad but not surprising. Lest we forget, this is a nation where more than half the population doubts evolution, and where an increasing percentage believes Obama wasn't born in the U.S.
Are you actually friends with your co-workers? If so I would confront them. I might not waste my time participating in the next pot-luck.
I am sorry, I will eat your brownies!
Opt Out of Participating
I wouldn't participate anymore and I'd would never eat their foods. This particular group of ppl are demeaning and disrespectful. I won't waste my time making anything for them.
What if they didn't know you were positive at all? My employer caters food or we have to purchase store-bought food. How do we know if the ppl that prepared the food aren't HIV positive? When you eat out at restaurants and drive thrus...how do we know who is preparing our foods?
I am not surprised at the ignorance around HIV even after 29 years of a pandemic. People believe what they want to believe regardless of the scientific literature telling them something different. I believe they live in a world of 'what if' and certainly 'what if' the government is lying to us, must be in the forefront of their minds. All it will take in one individual to eat one of your brownies to break the ice. Tell them that you have offers from around the world to eat your brownies.
Hi girl, forget them, tell you what? Dont touch anything they give you either, dont get upset because of them, it's not good for your health, stress will compromise your immune system. Treat them exaclty the same way they treat you after all they are not your friend, just get on with your work and forget them. In my honest opinion, they are just a bunch of loosers. Did they get checked to see if they are still negative? including your boss? these are the very people who will have a difficult time accepting themselves, family, friends & relatives if they were to be HIV+.
Be joyful at work and ignore them. Have a lovely day, i would love to eat those chocolate brownies...mhxwaa...lots of love babe.
How will they ever know that your feelings were hurt if you do not communicate this to them? At that time you can also explain that the foods you bring in do not contain potential for HIV/ AIDS. Sounds like they just need to be educated and maybe you are the one to help with that. So many hearts can be healed if only people would communicate their thoughts, feelings, needs and desires. We are not yet at a point in time where we can read each other's minds, but perhaps we will get there some day.
hey pass those brownies!!!! i will have the whole lot thanku
hey pass those brownies!!!!
Recently, sitting with a friend and he said out of the blue , ' HIV scarces the shit outta me" . I said and it should then I had to ask a few questions and now we talk about whatever he wants to know. This is not even a romantic situation nor a work situation we been friends for years. I knew something was off. I found I can not help if I dont open my mouth and share what I know. Since that we have been back on track .
Learning I was HIV positive is just as scary for some to talk about . I agree we must try to commmunicate our feelings toi each other so we can better understand whats going on in our head, for me I can make up scenerios sometimes over stuff I didnt inquire about get all worked up then learn about the topic and be like Oh shit why did I do this to me ?
Forget them say your piece or drop literature and Ill bake some browmies for us all. Much love Stay beautiful