This is a poem I wrote while struggling with my lack of confidence in myself, I thought about my ancestors, my grandparents and their grandparents and their grandparents and the strength they had. I was always in awe of my great grandparents and my grandparents. I was lucky enough to know them all, my great grandmother raised me from 15 until I married and she was the most amazing woman I've ever known. I struggle very much with my confidence and self esteem every day, especially in leadership roles, but my chapter needs me to be a good leader, and they deserve better than what I've been giving. But voices tell me I'm not good enough, I'm not smart enough, I'm not strong enough, I'm not accepted enough, I'm just not enough. Every day I deal with those thoughts.
But today this thought crossed my mind: "The strength of my ancestors is in me," and when it crossed my mind I cried. I decided to write a poem about it so I never forget. So I will think about this when hard times come, when I feel inadequate, when I feel like I'm too weak to go on. I remember the hard times that I've been through and survived, and I remember the love of my great grandmother, the kindness and strength of my grandfathers, and I want to make them proud.
If you ever feel inadequate too, I hope this poem lifts your spirit.
The Spirit of My Ancestors
As I walk through the mystery of the forest of life,
Lightning strikes and fires burn,
The flames burn higher as I run from the strife,
But as all things die it is now my turn,
The pain is unbearable as my body consumes,
But the flames eventually die
All that is left are the smoke and the fumes,
But I refuse to sit here and cry,
From the ashes I rise with strength from where?
I do not know from whence it comes,
There should be nothing left of me to bare,
When you die you're dead where I come from,
But I rise from ashes and now I have wings,
My body and soul are now revived,
I can fly from my flames as my healing heart sings,
But I never forget the flames I survived,
The power of my ancestors runs through my veins,
I must remember this when I'm down,
My grandmother would toil and never complain,
Her love was family renowned,
My grandfather worked hard and was always kind,
My mother always took the lead,
My dad was a drunk but had a brilliant mind,
Now here I am their struggling seed,
But I know the strong blood from whence I came,
As it flows through my body, spirit and soul,
The blood of my ancestors and mine are the same,
I hope they're proud of the life I control,
So from this day I walk in the power they gave,
When the flames come near to me,
But it will take a lot to get me in the grave,
Because I know where my ancestors be,
They're in my heart, body, mind and soul,
They give me the vigor to face each day,
The strength of my ancestors is in my control,
And in the shadow of their spirit is where I will stay.
