Chiiiiillleee... You ever get so caught up in life that HIV doesn't even have a space in your thoughts?
Too often, I was told what I should say and how I should say it—by people working in HIV who do not have HIV.
It's not what others tell you about yourself; it's what you tell yourself that is important. You mold who you think and believe you are.
Nineteen years ago, I never imagined that I would one day have the strength to speak openly about my status in a leading HIV magazine. But here I am.
I share this journey with you all because I feel safety in our sisterhood. I have a safe place to live. My outreach is thriving. I owe all this to a new perspective on me.
Last year I had the pleasure of being part of Dandelions Movement writing workshop that brought more healing than I anticipated. Once upon a time I did enjoy writing - in my youth, when I had time.
It felt like a warm blanket, comforting me in moments of loneliness, sadness, depression, and anxiety. When the weight of my emotions became unbearable, alcohol was there to dull the edges.
Adjust the sails, regroup our path. Time takes time, breakthrough here at last.
If I can be such an inspiration to others, I must treat myself with the same love I freely give...
HIV had kept me locked in fear for over a decade, constantly worrying about stigma and judgement. But I reminded myself of everything I had learned through yoga, meditation, and mindfulness: Stay present.