Life has been such a paradox. A few years ago I woke up to a nightmare when I found out I was positive. However this nightmare made me more determined than ever to make my dream come true. My dream has come true. On the 7th of August I gave birth to a girl just like me :-). Looking at her face I forgot everything that could make me unhappy. When she started to smile it bought tears to my eyes. She is the light of my life. I have waited for this day forever.
When I found out that I was positive, I made every effort to keep myself good so that I could become pregnant. During my pregnancy I did everything to keep my baby safe. I started my meds from my 3rd month and am still taking them. I had a fairly healthy pregnancy and carried her till a day after she was due. She was born through C -section and weighed a happy 8 pounds. Today when I hold my baby in my arms, the need to keep myself going and be healthy for her is stronger than ever. I am waiting to see her first step, waiting to tie ribbons in her hair, waiting to take her to the park, waiting to get her all the pretty dresses I have always admired on little mannequins, waiting to see her off to school and many other such moments that I have heard other mothers talk about with so much pride.
I want to thank all the mothers and girls (on this blog) who encouraged me and offered moral support whenever needed.
While it makes me beam when people look at her and say she is just like you...in my heart i wish I can give her everything that's mine except for the HIV virus. We haven't checked her for HIV yet. The pediatrician has advised that we do her test in her 4th month. Till then every living moment I pray for her well being.