No peace! (As one of my sisters from 'A girl like me' would say…) whose responsibility is it to stop this virus from spreading? In recent years I have found that the burden lies solely with HIV+ people, women too be specific…. NO PEACE! People should take responsibility for their safety. Recently I had an unpleasant experience with someone of the opposite sex. I usually never disclose unless I see the relationship going further than a fling… in this case, it was a fling, so no need to disclose. Until Mr. Man tried to force me to have unprotected sex with him… even after freaking out he didn;t give in… until I neutralized him… with a hot slap in the face. He still does not know my status and I have decided to leave him, I’d rather be with someone who loves themselves than a careless man-child. I don’t want to be burdened with other people’s safety… even though I took a vow before God never to infect anyone. It's hard enough facing our health issues everyday without having to play cops for careless lovers, friends and family. This incident made me realize that the stigma is still pretty much out there… people with HIV are expected to look a certain way. If you are beautiful, healthy, sexy, with no rash people assume you don’t have the virus. That’s disturbing…No peace indeed.




celina5000's picture

Dear tatty2gud, what an awful experience. You have my empathy and I send you a big hug and for your muddled man: another slap in the face. love Gisele


Jenny's picture

I so agree with what you say!

I quote “No peace! (As one of my sisters from ‘A girl like me’ would say…) whose responsibility is it to stop this virus from spreading? In recent years I have found that the burden lies solely with HIV+ people, women too be specific…. NO PEACE! People should take responsibility for their safety.”

I am a transsexual woman and like you I am so proud to be! If you take a read of my profile from ‘Sex and Me’ then you will see that I advocate HIV and sexual health checks before, rather than after sex. I also suggest ‘AQ’ Ask the Question, meet and if you want it to go further then wait the four weeks for the combined p24 antigen/antibody test, then you both know your status.

One life and for so many it need not be with the ever present concern if the question is asked and tests taken before sex.

I so admire you!

With much love..


Jenny's picture

The link is here


bee2art's picture

Tatty2gud, you are a strong woman! I agree that the disease stops with women, we must take care to not pass it and respect ourselves enough to not be reinfected by someone else's carelessness. He has shown that he does not respect himself or you, for a man who really cared for you would make sure HE WASN'T passing the disease to you by using protection himself. Stay strong Tatty! Much love and respect....


akwir mirriam ojok's picture

You go girl you did the best thing ever, Stigma is the main cause of silence and increased new infections especially in Africa. As women we face both Stigma and Violence at the same time it is indeed our responsibilities as HIV+s to take care of our self and the people around us. I have faced it all and many times slapped Men to protect them, protect myself from reinfections and defend myself. I also do what you do because i don't want any body to get this from me. I fight with my family on a daily basis since they love to share every thing including shape objects. Its our duty to fight and end HIV/AIDS one day.

Much love and a big Huge for you. just keep the fire burning in the fight.


Amanda's picture

He was probably HIV positive already. Some man are dogs! sorry


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