Sharing My HIV Status With My Mum

Submitted on Mar 31, 2023 by  AnaMaria77

I remember this special occasion as if it was today. It was my youngest sister's baptism and as my mum prepared to take a picture with my sister, I jumped up and made sure I was part of the picture too. You can see that I'm looking away, my stance and expression is me almost showing my other siblings that I get my way, considering they said that I wasn't supposed to be in the picture.

My mum is one of the strongest woman that I know. I love her to bits, I would always jump at an opportunity to be by her side. Every night I would pray to God, beg him to take me at the same time my mum would eventually come to pass away. A bit drastic I know, what a wish for a very young girl. Well that wish changed when I eventually became a mother myself. By then, I understood that parents should go first then the children, this is the expected life cycle.

Today, what I really want to share is my mum's response when I shared my HIV status.

Telling my mum was nerve wracking but it turned out to be a very positive response. For my surprise, she knew all about the difference between the virus and the late stage of HIV, only not being sure about the treatment itself. I explained that I only take one pill a day (bear in mind she is 70 years old and experienced the stigmatising 80's & 90's AIDS stories).

She is living with diabetes and she quickly lifted up her shirt and said "better than my treatment for diabetes… look at my belly ruined by insulin injections".

I was crying and she hugged me tight and said: "Don't cry my daughter, I know you will not fall ill, as you are living in UK I'm sure the treatment is good, but if you fall ill I will feed you". Then she said how proud she is to have me as her daughter and that she would never turn her back on me.

I knew this day was the beginning of finding myself again.

After this positive and compassionate experience I decided to be visible and not let other people's judgements define the person that I am.

I'm aware that unfortunately this might not be a reality to many. But I think it's important to share positive experiences as it may help and encourage someone to share with their parents and family. ❤️

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Blogger, AnaMaria77, and logo for A Girl Like Me.

Submitted by Positive Sunbeam
1

Hi Ana!
Thank you for this sweet storytelling of motherhood. I applaud you. You inspire me to continue my vunerabilty trusting support shows up from loved ones. Rock on sweet sister?

Submitted by Marig2016
1

Thank you for sharing! This hit close to home as my mother and I are close and i dreaded telling her about my diagnosis. I am so glad that your mom loved you past diagnosis as mine did also. Thank you for being part of our community and sharing your experience and living out loud. We never know how our voice will help someone else. 

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